I was going to begin this new series with a post detailing something I have experienced a few months ago, but tonight I decided I am not going to do that, because, given current events that unfolded in my life, my focus is a different one as I am writing this.
This is the thing about mental illness in today's society. The biggest problems you face are not problems created by your illness. Doctors would like you to believe that your illness is the root of your problems, and that the only way to fix your problems is to work on your illness. That is a blatant and malicious lie. They are not ashamed to tell that lie, they do not have any regrets about telling you this lie, they do not even think about the fact that they are telling you a lie, it is their job to tell you this lie, that is what they get paid for, that is the whole reason for their existence. They do not do you any service by telling you this lie, on the contrary, it is as counterproductive as can be. Who they do a service for are the people who do not suffer from an illness and would like you removed from society, and they provide said service through this lie by getting you so worked up with introspection and obsession over every single brain cell that may be wrongly aligned that you so completely phase out the outside world that you get out of people's sight and cannot and will not address the true root of your problems.
No, the true root of your problems is not within yourself. The root of your problem is everybody else. Of course you have been brainwashed into thinking that admitting this equates to pointing the finger, pushing the blame away from yourself and being selfish and arrogant and irresponsible and worse than Hitler. But, for one second, try to reject these notions that have been shoved down your throat since you barely learned how to drool. Look at how people behave towards you once they know you suffer from a mental illness. Be realistic. You are no longer a human being. You do not have feelings. You have no wants or needs, you have no dreams, and God beware if you should utter so much as a hint of ambition. Everything you say is judged in the framework of how people view you as a mentally ill person. Every tiny mishap morphs from "well, that happens" to "you are such a fuck-up, you can never get anything right." Face it, in today's society, you are less than an animal. You have no rights. You have no value. Your very existence is a stain on everything people value.
The problem begins to get ugly once the attitude of people around you because of your illness interacts with the illness, because the latter - this is true for a huge variety of diagnoses - tends to make you take the things you are told day in and day out to heart and each single such utterance tends to fuck you up more and more. And people quickly realise that. You know what people do once they realise they have the power to fuck someone up? There have been a few pilot studies on the subject, such as the Milgram experiment or the Stanford prison experiment, but these deal with healthy people. Even in the darkest chapters of our history, be it the treatment of Jews in Nazi Germany or the treatment of blacks in the United States' past, you were dealing with healthy people, who despite all the shit they faced were at least left with the ability to "suck it up." Still, even in those pilot studies or those periods in our history, a person in total control over a person's life will do anything to abuse this control. Now think of how this plays out when said person is in control not only over somebody's body, but also in control over somebody's mind. Just imagine the power to make someone experience a severe psychotic, anxious, depressive, borderline or whatever episode at the snap of your finger.
That's right, self-proclaimed "healthy" people get a huge fucking hard-on through making you miserable in every possible way, because they can, and it feels so very, very good to them that they can. It sure beats whipping a black slave who can suck it up and come out stronger and not lose any sleep over it. No, mental abuse does so much more damage and in turn gives you so much more pleasure. It is as traumatic as rape, if not more so. And you know the best part? You can do it every day, every time of the day, for year after year, and do you ever have to fear repercussions? Sure, that basket case can go to the police, who are they going to believe? They'll probably join in the fun and lock you up with no medication or have you committed rather than go through any trouble protecting you from constant mental rape suffered over the whole course of your life.
Well, there's a ray of sunshine. Because this post is the beginning of the end. Yes, I am aware of the fact that 99% of all responses I will get to this post will accuse me of whining, diverting blame, misrepresenting facts, lying, attention-whoring, playing victim or simply being worthless dirt that needs to be sent to the camps with the rest of my kind. But I've had it. I have made the decision that I am going to fight back right here, right now. This shit has to end. And this shit will end, or I will die trying to make it so. The mutants are revolting, baby, and the days of your total control over our minds and bodies are numbered.